Weekend Wrap-Up

I dragged my sick body out of bed long enough to vent on what I saw all weekend in sports. I may feel like a leper from Calcutta, but that did not stop me from watching about 75 different games this week. Direct TV is a gift from the Gods. I swear.

Let's start with the baseball playoffs...

The World Series begins this week, as the Yankees and Angels are ready for their showdown that has been destined since the All Star Break. No, that was not a typo, winner of this series wins it all. A National League team has a better shot at seeing Jesus than beating one of these teams.

ARod finally has the monkey off of his back. I will die of laughter if I hear another Yankee fan cry about how ARod does not hit in the clutch. He just won an entire series almost single handedly.

I dunno what was worse, Matt Holliday misjudging a flyball that hit him right in the bullseye, or Jonathan Paplebon going Chernobyl in Fenway yesterday. I have to admit, for the non-Cardinals and Red Sox fans, both were vividly entertaining.

The play Derek Jeter made last night late in the game, is the heads-up plays that legends are made out of. Fundemental baseball is such a lost science.

I will not even comment on the Phillies-Rockies. The game ended past my bedtime, and just watching that game made my sick carcass fetch another blanket.

Next, College Football...

LSU is such a fraud. How in the world was this team ranked 4th in the country? I know why. Two reasons. One, CBS needed to hype the prime-time game between LSU and Florida. Second, the polls are more rigged than an Albanian poker game or a Trotter's race. I will let you decide on that one.

I do not want to hear any "expert" state that Tim Tebow should remotely win the Heisman this season. Sorry, but under 200 yards passing, and just willing your team to victory is not enough. Tell me one good reason why Tebow should win the Heisman over Colt Mccoy, Jimmy Clausen, or Tony Pike?

Speaking of Mccoy, Texas is a boarderline fraud as well. Great teams are not trailing 17-14 in the 2nd half to the likes of Colorado in their own house. If Texas keeps on playing only one half in games, they will get clipped by Oklahoma.

The real great team is Alabama. Their defense is better than at least 10 NFL teams defenses. They have a solid OLine, with a rugged RB, and an All-World talent at WR.

They have everything, but a QB. The Mcelroy kid is a complete deer in headlights. I watched the Ole Miss game on Saturday. Mcelroy did not look off one receiver all game long. Do that against Florida, and they will beat the Tide by 10 like last SEC Championship.

From what I have been watching, the Title Game, should just be a rematch of the SEC Title game. Florida and Alabama are head and shoulders better than everyone else, including Texas.

Although, you know USC will somehow weasel their way into the Title Game. USC and Ohio St. are the two most overhyped programs in the nation. Sickening.

Finally, the sweet National Football League...

Best part of the NFL day? Not only did Josh Mcdaniels the pupil beat his teacher Bill Belichick, he left the grumpy nutjob, and the CBS cameras hanging for the postgame handshake. If you can, take a look at Belichick's face during it all. Priceless. Expect a cutthroat 2007 Pats like eff-you game the next time the Pats and Broncos play.

Gary Kubiak should be shot and buried for the awful playcalling and personnel changes. First and Goal, and you cannot punch it in? That is the second time this season Kubiak lost a game with his backup RB, Chris Brown getting pressure crunchtime carries. Texans should be 4-1.Just awful!

I bet Dre Bly showered and sprinted out of the locker room after losing the ball trying to showboat off an interception when the team is getting slamdanced on. I think it was the shovel, lawn darts, and bag of lye sitting right outside Mike Singletary's office.

Manning brothers 42, Tennessee Raiders 16

While mentioning the Raiders, can we finally call Jamarcus Russell an Offical Bust? He was the third best QB playing in the Raiders-Giants game. Yes, shellshocked David Carr is miles better than Russell, who reacts on the field like he smoked two ounces of weed by himself, on a streak of 72 hours without sleep.

The Browns-Bills game was by far, the worst game of this decade I have seen. I have never seen a team win when their QB was 2-17!!!! Derek Anderson went 2-17. STIFF ALERT!!! That is not a typo. After this game, Terrell Owens should be on Defcon 1.

Ok, we get it media. Brett Favre turned 40 years of age. Now, please stop mentioning every motion that diva makes before I feel compelled to Tom Cable one of you. I dunno what is more pathetic in this NFL season, media's crush on Favre, the Rams, or Tom Brady crying for shadow roughing the passer calls.

I am calling it right now. The Giants next week go into New Orleans and smack the Saints up physically. Giants win that game by at least 10 points. Eli Manning in a rare zone that is usually reserved for big bro.

I think Miles Austin and Roddy White had more receiving yards combined than the Cleveland Browns have had all season. We may need to look that one up.

Monday Night Football Prediction:

Jets get back Calvin Pace, who is their best pass rusher. Dolphins will try and run the ball, but the Jets defense is salavating to let Chad Henne air it out. Close, physical game. Do not expect alot of points.

Jets 20, Dolphins 10

(Apologies for no pictures or images on this post. Blogger is on the fritz, and did not even have the link up for me to have the option. Will be fixed for the future.)