NFL Picks for Week 11

It is coming in late, thanks to a classic Oregon-Arizona double OT thriller that I fell asleep right after. We will do a quick predictions and a first, MVP Watch.

MVP Watch

1. Peyton Manning QB, Colts - He is not the MVP of this team. He IS this team.

2. Drew Brees QB, Saints - Holding the 2nd spot strong, even after a few sub-par games for Brees standards. Will hold at spots 1 or 2 as long as the Saints are undefeated.

3. Adrian Peterson RB, Vikings - Eventhough the fumbling is an issue, he is having a monster season and I do not have the stones to put The Days of Our Favre here.

4. Chris Johnson RB, Titans - Tough to put up on here since the Titans have a sub .500 record, but have you seen the stats the past 3 weeks? He should be on this list if you have him in any Fantasy Football league.

5. Steven Jackson RB, Rams - This one must be scratching your head even more, but hear me out. The Rams have zero offense after Jackson. Teams put eight, nine guys in the box to stop him. What is Jackson's stats pro-rated to end the 09 season? 1627 yards rushing on 4.8 per carry. Name another RB in football other than Chris Johnson that could pull that feat off?

Honorable Mention: Tom Brady QB Patriots, Carson Palmer QB Bengals, Jared Allen DE Vikings, Maurice Jones Drew RB Jags.

We lost the Thursday Night game, as Ricky Williams hit the Fountain of Youth and had himself perhaps his best game in his career. Here are the rest of the games:

Detroit Lions 24, Cleveland Browns 15 - What a God-awful game. The Brownies actually played good defense the other night, but does anyone think Brady Quinn can lead this team into the endzone? Neither do I. Stafford to Megatron Johnson for 2 scores, and the Brownies boot 5 field goals.

San Francisco 49ers 23, Green Bay Packers 20 - I have zero faith in Aaron Rodgers right now. Let me rephrase that, I have no faith in his Offensive Line. 49ers will bring some heat, and Frank Gore can run on anyone.

Pittsburgh Steelers 38, Kansas City Chiefs 17 - No Troy Polamalu, which any team can exploit, but do you really think the Steelers are going to lose to a stiff team like the Chiefs after getting their butts kicked last week? There is a better chance of Paulie Shore getting the next acting lead in Ridley Scott's next blockbuster.

Jacksonville Jaguars 27, Buffalo Bills 20 - Usually this is where I take the Jags, and they put up a complete egg (See the Seattle game). The Bills just cannot stop the run, and Tiny Jones Drew is a human pinball.

New Orleans Saints 37, Tampa Bay Bucs 27 - Herm Edwards of ESPN predicted the monster upset here, espeically if the Bucs are wearing the creamsicles (Love those Unis!), but I do not have the minerals to make that selection. Saints running game should feast no the Bucs.

New York Giants 31, Atlanta Falcons 20 - The Giants are back after a much, much needed Bye Week, and they will finally have starting CB Aaron Ross back. No Michael Turner for the Falcons, meaning that Matt Ryan will try to do too much on the road. Giants get back on track.

Washington Redskins 17, Dallas Cowboys 16 - UPSET SPECIAL! The Redskins still play tough defense. Any NFC East game is always up for grabs, and the Cowboys laid an egg last week. Stranger things have happened.

Minnesota Vikings 34, Seattle Seahawks 17 - One of our all time faves Matt Hasselback has what it takes to pull off this upset. He just cannot pull it off on his back. Hawks OLine is shoddy, and the Vikings front 4 is the best in the league. Along with Hasselback's bad back, just a nightmare matchup for Matty.

Indianapolis Colts 27, Baltimore Ravens 14 - Yes, the Ravens won on Monday Night, but by default. They looked flat against the worst team in football. Now, they face the best team in football. Manning sees this secondary and is looking to sew up the MVP right now. Stay thirsty my friends....

Cincinnati Bengals 41, Oakland Raiders 9 - I heard that this could be a trap game for the Bengals. Get real. This coaching staff is too hardcore to let this team think past any other team. Larry Johnson will get action, and could enjoy a decent game against this Raiders rushing defense. Well, that is what we have to offically call it. I call jogging.

St. Louis Rams 23, Arizona Cardinals 21 - UPSET SPECIAL #2! The Rams have been playing good ball the past few weeks, and the offense has awoken. The Cardinals do have a very good run defense, but has that stopped Steven Jackson? Jackson has ran for 100+ yards against the Colts, Saints, Packers, and Redskins.

San Diego Chargers 27, Denver Broncos 18 - We dunno how effective Kyle Orton will be, but the Bolts defense has gotten better throughout the season, applying more and more pressure each week. The LT Revival continues this week.

New England Patriots 41, New York Jets 17 - Now, I am a Jets fan, but there are several things going against them this week.

1. No Kris Jenkins

2. Wes Welker is playing this game.

3. Belichick lost last week, combined with a home game this week (We mentioned this formula already in the past.).

4. The Eff-You Factor. Jets talked way too much trash for the first game. Pats will not take their foot off their throats.

5. Kerry Rhodes had another photo shoot this week, missing another film session. (Ok, this is not true, but you get the idea right?)

Philadelphia Eagles 38, Chicago Bears 20 - Just a bad, bad matchup for the Bears defense. Think what the Bengals did to this secondary, and I raise you Deshaun Jackson and Jeremy Maclin. Too much speed for the Bears to contest with. The only reason Lovie Smith will keep his job after this season is because of money owed to him.

This Week : 0-1

Last Week: 10-4

Season: 91-51 (Will not count this week's games until they are all over with.)

Weekend Wrap-Up

I was thinking of an opening to start this article, but I could not think of anything better than to continue on the last thing I wrote about in the previous article.

I wished American Heavyweight Chris Arreola good luck in his title fight against Vitali Klitschko. I am a massive boxing fan, but I never seriously thought that Arreola was this country's great big hope in returning to Heavyweight glory. Then, I was watching on HBO, and I heard in a segment about Arreola, that HBO's Larry Merchant called Arreola "The best American Heavyweight prospect since Riddick Bowe.".

Yes, when I heard it, I thought the same thing. This old man finally really lost his marbles, and that Merchant basically gave Arreola the perverbial Kiss of Death.

Merchant did exactly that. Arreola, coming into the fight in better shape than the usual walking torilla machine, was flat out embarassed by the older, more polished Klitschko. It was actually more one-sided than the Mayweather-Marquez fight HBO showed before this live fight. Somehow, HBO's unoffical judge gave one round to Arreola. He must of been having drinks with Merchant all night long to think that.

If this is supposedly the best this country has to offer in over 15 years, will we ever see another great U.S. Heavyweight?

Baseball Thoughts:

-Congrats to the New York Yankees, and their fans for wrapping up the AL East by waterboarding their rival Red Sox this weekend. Now ironically, you have to root for the Red Sox to beat the Angels, who just have your number since early on in the Torre administration. The enemy of my emeny is my frien. Even Shakespeare would be proud of this.

-Zach Greinke wrapped up the AL CY with win #16 and those sick stats. CC Sabathia was just too little, too late, even though he has been awesome the last 6 weeks.

College Football Thoughts:

-We all know that the College Football Polls are as straight and legit as Al Capone's business ledgers. I mean, personally, I knew everyone the week before was overhyping Miami in the polls. I thought that was bad, but this week might be the worst ever. USC going up five spots by beating a bad Washington St. team at home? LSU going up to #4 after almost getting upsetted by Mississippi St.? I actually rather have the hands of the National Title in the computers if this is the crap that will continue to go on.

-At least we found out the serious pretenders in this college season early. That goes to you California, Penn St., and Mississippi. I will not put Miami in that mix. I give The U alot of props for playing that schedule.

-I really do believe Alabama is better than Florida this time around. Round 2 of the new annual SEC Title war is going to be one of the five best football games this year, NFL included.

-USC went to #5 in the polls somehow while I wrote this article...

NFL Thoughts:

-Whoever reads this blog, knows how sick I must of been watching Favre toss that game winning TD pass and basically being carried off the field like Scott Howard after hitting those two game winning free throws in Teen Wolf. Although, even I have to admit, what a pass.

-I wonder if the city of Detroit was more excited about the Lions finally winning a game than about the Tigers in the middle of a divison race. Congrats to the Lions for finally reeling off a W, and good luck to the Tigers. That city needs all the excitement it can muster nowadays.

-I do not know which game was a bigger mismatch. Cleveland-Baltimore, or NY Giants-Tampa Bay. Two rare examples of men playing against boys. Giants just stomped a mudhole into the Bucs, and put up a convincing shutout without their best defensive player in Justin Tuck. Baltimore even threw the Eff-You Bomb in the 4th quarter for a 70+ yard TD. Mangini must of fined his CB for using a fire extinugisher on himself after getting burnt...

-Peyton Manning is a football God. There is much else to say about him. Chris Collinsworth on the Sunday Night game showed and explained how Manning at the line delays until he sees the defense bite on their blitzing, and calls the audibles/hot routes from there. That is why Collingsworth is the best analyst in the game.

Now Chris, please explain to me how Jim Zorn will still have a job this week?

-I cannot wait for the Jets-Saints game next week. The Unstoppable Force against the Immovable Object. Brees against Sanchez, who is becoming the most popular athlete in NYC this side of Derek Jeter and fast. The matchup I really want to see is Saints tall, physical WR Marques Coltson, who might have a chip on his shoulder still from playing at Hofstra, where the Jets use to practice, and being overlooked by them, against Darrelle "Island" Revis.

-I actually Tweeted ESPN guru Adam Schefter if he thought Revis was the early frontrunner for NFL Def. Player of the Year. He immediately replied to me by saying, "So far, hard to think of anyone else more deserving." High praise for a Cornerback.

Monday Night Pick for tonight.

I am in the minority if thinking that the Panthers are not completely done. I think they will play hard in this game. I just do not think it will be enough. Tony Romo puts up a big game, and makes less mistakes than Jake Delhomme. Dallas Cowboys 34, Carolina Panthers 24.

NFL Picks Week 3

Before I mention the picks for this week, I just woke up from a nap that came out of nowhere, and when I woke up, Saint Tim Tebow was on the ground, barely moving. I was like, WTF just happened? Then I saw the replay, and let me tell you, Tebow got jacked up!! Good job Gators, let your entire program get flattened by a defender untouched.

Now, onto Week 3 NFL Picks. Came back down to earth last week, with an 8-8 record. It is still respectable, but not what we expect here at SportsTown. The overall record lies at 21-10. I feel another 12-4 day coming again, I smell it... or is that what I just put in the oven. Whoops!

Green Bay Packers 38, St. Louis Rams 17 - Let me see, pissed off stud QB? Check. A star WR that got shutout last week? Check? Opposition is one of the worst 3 teams in football? Check. Green Bay is going to remind the Rams fans about The Greatest Show on Turf tomorrow, which is harsh to that fanbase.

Philadelphia Eagles 34, KC Chiefs 20 - No Mcnabb again. The Michael Vick Sideshow is in full blast this week and half the offense is questionable for the game. I do not care if the Eagles practice squad had to play this game. This is the same KC Chiefs team that lost to the Raiders last week when Jamarcus Russell's completion percentage sounded more like DUI than anything else. Russell still has not completed 10 passes all week long, but this dsyfunctional bunch lost. You expect them to win IN Philly now?

Baltimore Ravens 41, Cleveland Browns 3 - This is like if Mike Tyson from 1986 fought Waldo from the Van Halen Hot for Teacher video. It's just not fair, but of course we will watch! This country loves a good old American bloodbath. By the way, I bet 99% of this country's knockout pool pickm is the Ravens this week.

New England Patriots 24, Atlanta Falcons 20 - I love the Falcons. Love everything about this team, to the way it is ran, the coach, and of course, Matt Ryan. They are just not ready to win this type of game on the road, when we all know Bill Belichick and Tom Brady are going to be in complete Rocky in Russia mode after last week.

Washington Redskins 27, Detroit Lions 20 - Everyone and their mother is picking the Lions to finally break the losing streak. I say, prove it to me first. The Redskins have put up points against the Lions in recents years, so I have no idea why people are trying to call out a complete posh pick. Although, if the Lions won this game, Daniel Synder would electricute himself, put on a black hood, put in yellow contacts, and become The Emperor from Star Wars in a fit of rage. Maybe thats reason enough to.... nope.

New York Jets 13, Tennessess Titans 10 - Suppose to rain at the Meadowlands tomorrow, so expect an ugly game. I just doubt that set  of hyenas Rex Ryan sends out on defense would let Chris Johnson break one off like he did non-stop last week. This Titans team may become the best 0-3 team of all time.

Minnesota Vikings 21, SF 49ers 17 - I am really liking what Mike Singletary is doing in SF. They will keep this game close, but I just do not see the Vikings losing this game at home. Of course, I am rooting against The Days of Our Favre on a weekly basis though.

New York Giants 31, Tampa Bay Bucs 13 - The Bucs defensive glory is a figment of the past now. If Trent Edwards and Fred Jackson can carve up this defense, what do you think Eli Manning and Brandon Jacobs will do? Especially Manning coming off perhaps one of his top 2-3 games in his career.

Houston Texans 38, Jacksonville Jaguars 20 - The aerial show of Houston finally broke out last week. Now, they have to get Steve Slaton involved. Put both together, and you have yourself a real serious offense. Kurt Warner is still completing passes in Jacksonville tonight. I think he is up to 123 comp. in 125 attempts.

Chicago Bears 23, Seattle Seahawks 9 - I cringed last week seeing Matt Hasselback get hit like that. I knew right away he was going to be hurt. I just did not know that when he tried to stand up, he looked like Timmy from South Park. The Hawks are toast without the bald hero. Bears start catching steam.

Buffalo Bills 34, New Orleans Saints 31 - UPSET SPECIAL!! It most likely will not be this score, with rain in the forecast. If Mother Nature decides to be a bitch, and is on the Bills side, I just think the Saints are in deep trouble. Remember, this is the same Saints defense that gave up close to 400 yards passing to Kevin Kolb!

Cincinnati Bengals 19, Pittsburgh Steelers 16 - UPSET SPECIAL part Deux! I am probaly out of my mind with this one. I have definitely had a sip of the Bengal Kool-Aid. I just really like this defense. Big Ben is going to get hit and hit often in this game. Everyone can just kill me on Monday for this pick.

Oakland Raiders 17, Denver Broncos 10 - I just cannot put this horrific Broncos team 3-0. Find a reason to make this pick legit... please.... ok, Darren Mcfadden goes off in this game. I just cannot have this band of misfits 3-0 and the Titans 0-3.

San Diego Chargers 27, Miami Dolphins 24 - Just stick a fork in the Phins. 45 minutes of time of possession and you lose? Phillip Rivers saw that game and must of been salivating. If Dallas Clark is carving those linebackers and safeties for 150+, what is Mr. Gates going to do? Even LT might score in this game from the VIP booth.

Arizona Cardinals 44, Indy Colts 41 - The equivalent to the Texas Tech-Houston game in college this week. This game will be a fantasy football wet dream come true. 800 yards passing, no doubt about it. When it is all said and done, I am just going with the road team, eventhough it is a mortal sin to go against God (Peyton Manning).

Last, I wish Mexican American boxer Cris Arreola tonight in his Heavyweight Championship fight against Vitali Klitschko. I just hope his fat ass realized that this might be his only shot at a belt, and did not come into this fight close to 3 bills. If he does, another Mexican fighter is going to get embarassed like last week.

Sorry for the popshot Marquez, you are still my favorite fighter, but you did get housed last week.

Weekend Wrap-Up

Great weekend for sports, I just could not get fully into it though. Unfortunately, life takes precedent over the awesome world of sports.

I did not catch much College Football on Saturday, but I am sure the look on Pete Carroll's face was priceless after USC lost to Washington. See that Pete? Wave goodbye to that. What is it? Oh, that was your shot at the BCS title game. Congrats to Steve Sarkisian, beating USC with Tyrone Willingham's recruits. Thats something Charlies Weis could not do.

Let me get this straight now. Tebow puts up a Fulton St. fish market type of a stinker, and he still should be considered for the Heisman? Right now, I have Jimmy Clausen, Javhid Best, and Jacory Harris over Tebow by a wide margin.

Have to feel for Nebraska. They go out and play a great game on the road against a top 15 team, just to lose it in the final minute. That has to feel like if you opened your bedroom door after finding out you got a promotion at work, just to see your new boss is in bed with your wife. I seriously would rather have what happened to BYU, and that was getting embarrassed big time against Florida St. Point is, I always rather get backhanded that punched right in the gut.

I would please like to have my 60 dollars back, and the three hours of my life that was the Mayweather-Marquez PPV. If you are a boxing fan, and you wonder why MMA is more popular, watch that fight again. Too much BS in the sport that I love, which I have to admit, really is dying.

I do have to thank Shane Mosely, Bernard Hopkins, and an assist to Max Kellerman for basically putting Mayweather in the corner and on the spot in the post-fight interview. It was funny to watch, but classless. Thing is, to get the attention of a classless punk like Mayweather, you have to stoop to his level, and that is all the way down to the curb.

I did get to watch the NFL all day yesterday. I sat on my duff, with a drink and some cookies, and put on the Direct TV NFL Package, and all was better. Best game of the week was the Pats-Jets game, with Ravens-Chargers and Texans-Titans bringing in the silver and bronze medals there.

The Jets might just be the real deal. They talked more smack last week than Muhammad Ali in Manila, but they backed it up. The defense was stifiling, they did put Brady on his back more than six times. The crowd called the plead from Rex Ryan to be loud, and QB Mark Sanchez really showed alot of moxy in the 2nd half. Excellent win.

CB Darrelle Revis might of proved that he is the best CB in football, going on an island and shutting down Randy Moss this week, after doing the same to Andre Johnson last week, who just abused Cortland Finnegan this week. Speaking of...

How fun was that Texans-Titans game? It looked like someone had joystick control of RB Chris Johnson, and the Texans Andre Johnson. Insane.

This is why Norv Turner will NEVER win anything as a Head Coach. Rivers is roasting the Ravens secondary like chestnuts on an open fire around Christmas, and you run right at Ray Lewis on that play? I think even Gomer Pyle would of not done that. What a dolt.

I hope Giants All Pro DE Justin Tuck is not badly injured after Dallas T Flozell Adams cheaply tripped him. That was completely bush league, by an overrated, has-been, fat, overweight, and lets not forget about lazy player. Only reason why that was a close game last night was because as soon as Tuck as out, the Cowboys went nuts on the running game. Tuck is probably the best DLineman in the league because of the way he plays the run.

Now, tonight's game. I really believe that the Dolphins defense can give Peyton Manning and the Colts fits. If the Fins offense can eat up the clock and keep Manning off the field for large stretches, this game could be very interesting. Indy will not be able to run the ball on this defense either.

Dolphins 17, Colts 13.

Two more weeks for the NHL opener. Bring on more sports!

Week 1 NFL, College Football Wrap Up.

Wow! What a day of football.


Starting from noon Eastern Standard Time, until way past midnight, you have had nail-biters in College Football tonight.


I was suppose to have this post put up a long time ago. The NFL picks should have been up sometime this afternoon,  but the games sucked me in today, especially Notre Dame-Michigan and USC-Ohio St. Just a great product put out there today all around. Even the fact that my dumbass prediction of Oklahoma St. in the title game got stomped on like Edward Norton in American History X, not even that could put a damper on my excitement with the games today. (They still have an outside shot at the Title Game. Beat Texas, run the Big 12 table, etc. I also have an outside shot of finding diamonds in my backyard, but I will not hold my breath.)


Few things about these games today.


First off, Charlie Weis should be fired just based on his playcalling with less than 3 minutes to play. The Irish are up 3, they have the ball, and are THROWING!!!! Two incomplete passes later, the clock stopped twice, Michigan didn't have to burn timeouts, and the Wolverines got the ball back with 2:20 to play. That fantastic strategy Hungry Hungry Hippo.


Jimmy Clausen is going to be a good NFL Pro Quarterback. He convinced me.

Georgia and South Carolina could not score to save their lives last week. This week? They were running up and down the field like there was two opened trucks filled with electronics in each end zone. Damn!


USC grinded out a tough, tough win at the Horseshoe against Ohio St. Mark it on your calendar when USC and Cal hook up. It may just be to play in the National Title Game.


Florida St. is an embarrassment right now. Did you really almost lose to Jacksonville St.?? Down late in the 4th quarter? At home? (Shaking my head.) Oklahoma St. getting spanked by Houston at home, like the way Tom Cruise in Tropic Thunder describes how to spank an actor when they behave badly is almost as embarrassing.

Now, onto Week 1..... the.....

N...F...L is here!

Atlanta Falcons 23, Miami Dolphins 16 - Lofty expectations in Atlanta this season. Tricky, tough first game, but the Falcons just have too much firepower to be stopped all day long. Atlanta has to keep Matt Ryan on his feet though, as Miami will blitz and pressure him all day.


Baltimore Ravens 38, Kansas City Chiefs 9- This game is just not fair. Remember the movie Necessary Roughness from the 90's? Texas State's opening game, when the Coach benched Scott Bakula, and the backup QB was in screaming to the refs to blow the whistle? Well, that esstentially sums up this game. And to top it off, Matt Cassel might not even start. Big game by RB Ray Rice.


Philadelphia Eagles 27, Carolina 23 - This might be the game of the week. Two evenly matched teams, both with explosive offenses and physical defenses. I just think the Eagles are a little more explosive on the offensive side, because of Donovan Mcnabb.


Cincinnati Bengals 20, Denver Broncos 16 - People forget because they were an offensive laughing stock of Pop Warner Pee Wee Football levels last year, the Bengals defense was staunch in the 2nd half of last season. They also open up against the NFL's verison of Lindsay Lohan right now as well. The Broncos are a mess. Brandon Marshall will play after Daddy lightly tapped his ass and pretended that it was an actually smack after the crap he pulled in practice, but it will not be enough.


Minnesota Vikings 24, Cleveland Browns 6 - Speaking of messes, the Browns offense had less life than a corpse last year. And to top it off, The Mangenius kept everyone up in the air about who will play QB. Usually not a good omen to a season. Adrian Peterson will run wild, and I hope Brett Favre shatters his torso in the process.


Houston Texans 27, New York Jets 16 - I really do love the Texans offense if they can stay healthy this season. The Jets have a very formidable defense, but I think that it will take a few games to adjust and get use to the new players, and starting DE Shaun Ellis is suspended for this game. QB Mark Sanchez's debut will be a down one. Check out the matchup of WR Andre Johnson against CB Darrelle Revis. It does not get better than that.


Indianapolis Colts 28, Jacksonville Jaguars 17 - The Jags usually give Peyton Manning and crew a hard time, but this is a bit of a rebuilding year down in Florida. Manning starts his campaign to keep his MVP.


New Orleans Saints 41, Detroit Lions 31 - If RB Pierre Thomas were playing in this game, I would of said the Saints break 50. In the dome, the Saints will go marching all over the Lions defense. The Lions are improved, and yes, they will score on the Saints, its not hard to score when you could tell a rookie QB in Matthew Stafford to throw the ball as high and far as he could, and have the human freak, WR Calvin Johnson just outjumped everyone.


Dallas Cowboys 16, Tampa Bay Bucs 3- Low scoring affair, as it was last season. I just cannot see how the Bucs, with new offensive players all over the place, to keep the stingy Cowboys D off guard. OLB Demarcus Ware should have a field day. Watch out for RB Felix Jones.


San Francisco 49ers 31, Arizona Cardinals 24- UPSET ALERT! I remember watching the last time these two teams played last year on Monday Night Football in a bar, with a young kid that just placed a complete Bride-Jumping bet on the 49ers. (Too much money to say, on the 49ers Money Line +350.)
The 49ers lead most of the way, but lost at the end. I came out of that experience thinking two things. One, Mike Singletary will make the 49ers a tough team, and lastly, never bet an amount of money and be in public that when you lose the insane bet you made, it makes the rain fall down from your eyes.


New York Giants 17, Washington Redskins 10 - Two tough hombres going at it in the trenches. Expect this game to be a slightly lesser verison of Tennessee-Pittsburgh from Thursday night. We may see a QB on a stretcher this game, perhaps even lose a limb. The NFL is back! Got to love it!


Seattle Seahawks 38, St. Louis Rams 14 - The Seahawks are my Super Bowl pick. Did you really think I was going to pick against them? Not a snowballs chance in hell. Matty Hasselback is healthy, and is ready to roll through. Let's just hope the Rams RB Stephen Jackson does not get a rug burn on the carpet, and goes on IR for 5 games.


Green Bay Packers 31, Chicago Bears 23 - I know I picked the Bears to win the divison, but do not expect them to beat the Packers opening night in the hostile envoirment of Green Bay. I do not know how the Packers defense will adjust to the 3-4, but I do know that both teams have QB's that could hit a 747 out of the air with a throw if they wanted to. Expect long deep bombs.


I will pick the two Monday Night games tomorrow night, along with some highlights of what I saw while being pegged to my couch, watching the Direct TV's NFL Package all day long. I am telling you, Direct TV's NFL Package is in the top 10 greatest inventions of all time, inbetween the wheel and duct tape.

NFL Preview and Predictions-AFC

AFC East

New England Patriots 13-3
Miami Dolphins 8-8
New York Jets 7-9
Buffalo Bills 5-11


The Pats run away with this divison by Week 6, although trading DL Richard Seymour really does hurt their Super Bowl chances this season. Tom Brady airs it out all over the place and Randy Moss and Wes Welker both have Pro Bowl seasons. If the Pats get any sort of running game, expect them to put up 500 points this season and they will look like a video game on offense.

The Dolphins had a very nice run last season, and they are well-coached. Only problem is, the schedule gets tougher this year and you can not expect career years again from Chad Pennington and Joey Porter. OT Jake Long, last years #1 overall pick is a stud, and will be taking his annual trip to Hawaii.

The Jets are the team of the future in this divison. New Head Coach Rex Ryan brings an attitude to this team that was much needed. They will field a top defense this season, but rookie QB Mark Sanchez will have his growing pains. Expecting Matt Ryan in this situation is asking for too much. This team in 2010 though, especially in a potential uncapped season, watch out.

How do I say this without hurting anyones feelings? The Bills are a mess. They have one of the worst Head Coaches in football in Dick Jauron, their best player, RB Marshawn Lynch is suspended for the first 3 games, and they decide to bring in the 2nd biggest soap opera in the NFL next to Brett "Days of Our" Favre, in Terrell Owens. And to top it off, their recently fired Off. Coordinator told the media that Jauron basically wanted a Pop Warner Football offense. Expect a long, cold season up north.

AFC North

Baltimore Ravens 12-4
Pittsburgh Steelers 11-5
Cincinnati Bengals 7-9
Cleveland Browns 3-13

The Ravens lost some players on defense, especially LB Bart Scott, S Jim Leonhard, and of course, Def. Coordinator Rex Ryan to the Jets this offseason, but with LB Ray Lewis and S Ed Reed out on the field, they basically already have two coaches out on the field. The offense will be much improved with QB Joe Flacco getting more exerience and the emergence of RB Ray Rice, who looked great in the preseason.

The defending champs are still going to be a mjor threat. The Steelers bring back one of the staunchest defenses the league has ever seen, led by OLB James Harrison and S Troy Polamalu. I am just worried that the running game is not entirely there, and Big Ben is due for a lengthy 3-5 game absence from all the hits he take in the pocket for keeping the ball in his hands too long.

This is a big season for Bengals Head Coach Marvin Lewis. This team has underachieved for several seasons, and may be on the hot seat for his job. He does get back QB Carson Palmer, who was hurt most of last season. The only person even more happy to have Palmer back then Lewis, is WR Chad "Twitter" Ocho Cinco, who should have a solid bounce back season. They are at least fun to watch on HBO though.

This year in Cleveland, we get to see Round two of Man-Genius. New Head Coach Eric Mangini comes over from New York to attempt to clean up this mess. Only one thing, he has probably already this mess even worse by getting maybe 65 cents on the dollar for the 5th overall pick that wound up being Mark Sanchez, questionable drafting, and not even announcing a starting QB until the last second. Brady Quinn should win the job, but we will have to deal with Braylon Edwards with the dropzees, and RB Jamal Lewis hitting the hole slower than a stoner thinks.

AFC South

Indianpolis Colts 11-5
Houston Texans 10-6
Tennessee Titans 9-7
Jacksonville Jaguars 5-11

QB Peyton Manning and the Colts have their hands full this season. This is by far the toughest divison in the AFC, and Manning has to go this season for the first time without Canton-bound WR Marvin Harrison. He still does have WR Reggie Wayne and TE Dallas Clark to toss the pigskin to. Rookie RB Donald Brown takes Joseph Addai's starting spot by Week 5 and shines.

The Texans are the "it" team to finally take that rise up to playoff status. They have a ton of firepower on offense with QB Matt Schaub, RB Steve Slaton, and All-World WR Andre Johnson. The keys for this team is simple. Can DE Mario Williams and Co. keep teams to 20 points a game? Can Schaub stay healthy? If both answers are yes, they could take the divison. If both answers are no, then probaly another 8-8 season.

The Titans come into this season losing their best player in DT Albert Haynesworth to Washington, when he signed a contract that will pay him enough to eat cheeseburgers for the rest of his days. They have a tough schedule to boot, having to play both teams from last years Super Bowl, in Pittsburgh and Arizona, plus New England, Seattle, and San Diego the final week of the season. The Titans will have to grind out wins this season, but they are use to that.

I do not think Jags Head Coach Jack Del Rio survives this season. The Jags have alot of question marks on both sides of the ball, and they are really putting all the weight on the shoulders of RB Maurice Jones Drew. The offensive line is going to be kind of green as well, with the Jags taking OL in the draft, including 1st round pick, Eugene Monroe.

AFC West

San Diego Chargers 13-3
Oakland Raiders 7-9
Kansas City Chiefs 5-11
Denver Broncos 4-12

This divison is all Chargers. If they do not go at least 5-1 within this divison, there should be a firing line on the coaching staff. The offense is just loaded, with QB Phillip Rivers, RB LaDainian Tomlinson, TE Antonio Gates, and WR Vincent Jackson. The defense should be much improved with having a full training camp under Defensive Coordinator Ron Rivera and getting back OLB Shawne Merriman back from injury. They may lose him by Week 5 to a new strain of herpes though after encountering Tila Tequila though.

After the Chargers, it is like getting second place by default. We will go with the Raiders. Yes, I know they are a joke of an organization, but lets look at the positives for a change. They can run the ball effectively. They do have the best CB in football in Nnamdi Asomugha, and they just traded for DL Richard Seymour, who will help the DLine emmensely, both on and off the field.

Kansas City is going in the right direction, but it will take some time. They got their QB in Matt Cassel, and they are rebuilding that defense the right way, but that OLine is young and pretty awful. Actually, losing TE Tony Gonzalez to Atlanta via trade hurts Cassel the most, as he would've had a safety net.

Now, the Broncos are a team that is not going in the right direction. New Head Coach Josh "Mini-Belichick" Mcdaniels has flipped this franchise upside down in a few months. He handled the Jay Cutler situation poorly, and now, he may be doing an even worse job with WR, and crybaby Brandon Marshall. The defense is going into the 3-4 this season, and Mcdaniels does not have the personnel yet for that scheme to be successful. It is going to be a long season in Denver, at least they will get a potential Top 5 pick right? Oops, did Mcdaniels screw that one up as well? That pick is Seattle's.

Playoffs:

Wild Card Round: Indianpolis Colts over Pittsburgh Steelers
                       
                            Baltimore Ravens over Houston Texans

Divisonal Round: San Diego Chargers over Indianpolis Colts

                           Baltimore Ravens over New England Patriots

AFC Conf. Champ.: Baltimore Ravens over San Diego Chargers